December’s Failures

Welcome to my monthly “Failures” column, where I look back at some of the films I could, would, maybe even should have watched last month… but failed to.

I guess the big theatrical release of the month was the third entry in James Cameron’s sci-fi opus, Avatar: Fire and Ash, though I don’t feel like I heard much hype for it. That said, I’m kinda out of the loop on that nowadays, so who knows? The second one was unexpectedly huge at the box office, so I wouldn’t bet against this one doing big numbers also. I’ve still not seen the second one, Avatar: The Way of Water, which I think also counts as a December failure because the release of a followup should have been the perfect motivation to finally bung the disc in (yes, I own it. Of course I do).

The film that almost actually tempted me out of the house and into the multiplex this month was the long (long) awaited release of Kill Bill: The Whole Bloody Affair. It’s only taken us 22 years to get here! My local only had one screening and the time didn’t work for me, so that ended up being a no-go. Really hoping it gets a disc release. I also would have liked to have seen the BFI’s release of Silent Sherlock: Three Classic Cases, a bundle of examples from their project to restore the Stoll Picture / Eille Norwood series of silent-era Sherlock Holmes films. I couldn’t find a screening reasonably near me though. Another one I’ve hoped would come to disc for a long time (since before they announced the restoration project, but with renewed hope since they did).

Most blockbusters run in fear of a new Avatar, but the remake (or whatever — I saw Jack Black promoting it somewhere and it sounded more ‘meta’ than that) of Anaconda was the first to brave following in its wake, and I guess it was some kind of counter-programming to release a ping pong biopic starring Timothée Chalamet, Marty Supreme. Also out was youth-aimed video game horror sequel Five Nights at Freddy’s 2; James L. Brooks’s first directorial effort for a decade-and-a-half, Ella McCay; Scarlett Johansson’s directorial debut, Eleanor the Great; and a bunch of other stuff even less worthy of a mention (or I’ve forgotten why it’s on my short list and probably should have Googled it, you choose). Oh, and a pre-Netflix theatrical debut for Kate Winslet’s Goodbye June, which also then came to Netflix within the month.

Speaking of Netflix (yeah, I did a link), the biggest streaming debut of the month was undoubtedly the new Knives Out Benoit Blanc mystery, Wake Up Dead Man, but I actually saw that, so, um, moving on… Honestly, though, there’s not much else worth mentioning. I mean, Prime Video’s dog-based romcom Merv goes on my watchlist because I like dogs, Charlie Cox, and Zooey Deschanel, but it’s hardly a high-profile must-see, right? Though I feel like it’s a better bet than the film they did push, Michelle Pfeiffer-starring Christmas comedy Oh. What. Fun. I’m certainly not going to catch up with that in January.

There was more noteworthy stuff making its post-theatrical streaming debut, as a few big(ish) guns were wheeled out for the holiday season. I suppose chief among them was A Minecraft Movie on Sky Cinema / NOW, what with it being one of the biggest hits of the year. Joining it there was franchise-amalgamating legacy sequel Karate Kid: Legends (I feel like I need to finish Cobra Kai before that, even though I don’t think it directly follows on), Wes Anderson’s The Phoenician Scheme (I’m three or four behind on new Anderson films now), Ryan Coogler’s Sinners (which I already own on disc), and, um, Tinsel Town, a probably-should-be-a-TV-special festive romp with Kiefer Sutherland slumming it (although, where’s his career at these days, so maybe not) alongside Danny Dyer, Rebel Wilson, Jason Manford, and Derek Jacobi. Feels kinda random, but there you go.

Elsewhere, Apple TV+ dropped F1: The Movie, the nearest I’ve come to watching a movie on my phone (the trailer with haptic feedback was cool. Don’t know if they’ve done a version of the whole movie with that… and even if they did, I wouldn’t actually watch a movie on my phone); and Disney+ made a bid for middle-brow British audiences with Olivia Colman- and Benedict Cumberbatch-starring remake The Roses. Looping back round to Amazon, we also find David Mackenzie’s thriller Relay and a couple of those “it’s now in the public domain so we can make it into a horror movie” films, Bambi: The Reckoning and Popeye the Slayer Man. I guess we’re going to be seeing those pop up for years to come. Their existence amuses me, but I have no desire to watch any of them. Talking of rubbish, they also offered the new Red Sonja, which I rented for actual money (albeit discounted) and watched just last month. If I’d known it was coming as part of my Prime subscription, I wouldn’t have bothered… which I guess is why they don’t warn you.

Things that caught my attention among the back catalogue shifts included Netflix simultaneously adding both 2000’s How the Grinch Stole Christmas and 2018’s The Grinch, which stood out because I’ve never read or seen any version of that story, which caused me to get a question wrong in a work Christmas quiz (his dog is called Max, FYI). More significantly, Luca Guadagnino’s Challengers is now on iPlayer (I wonder if they considered holding off on it ’til Wimbledon season), and Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom is now on Prime — not truly a ‘significant’ film, but I did enjoy the first one. There are just so many superhero movies around nowadays, I never really know where to start with catching up… or, more accurately, don’t feel enough desire to dive into them. Maybe I should just give in and watch the key ones? But I digress.

As for my usual roundup of “stuff I own on disc but haven’t watched that is now also on streaming to remind me of my self-control problems”… well, the king of this category is Prime Video, and there I spy David Cronenberg’s The Brood, the 2021 Candyman, poliziotteschi Rulers of the City, and Voodoo Macbeth, plus a tonne of stuff I’ve meant to rewatch, a sampling of which includes Annihilation, Black Hawk Down, Collateral, Peter Jackson’s King Kong, The Limey, Man on Fire, The Prestige, Saving Private Ryan, David Cronenberg’s Scanners… and that’s not even all of them. iPlayer gave them a run for their money this month, though, with Baz Luhrmann’s Elvis, Get Carter (the original, obv), How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (they always show those at Christmas, for some reason), Marcel the Shell with Shoes On, and both Puss in Boots and Puss in Boots: The Last Wish. But they also dove into the rewatch category, with the likes of Double Indemnity, The Godfather trilogy (including the Coda version of Part III, which I’ve never seen), Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood (which I feel like pops on one service or another every month), The Third Man, and Unforgiven. It’s not news but, yeah, I should buy less stuff.

And I… am still buying stuff, of course, but I feel like this list isn’t as long as it used to be. Nearly everything is in 4K this month too, which is nice. The only exceptions are Masters of Cinema’s box set of 1960s Fantômas films, Fantomas Returns!, and the BFI’s recent release Battleship Potemkin with a score by the Pet Shop Boys. Elsewise, there’s a surprising amount of horror: giallo The House with Laughing Windows (an import of Arrow’s US release rather than settling for the UK equivalent); H.P. Lovecraft adaptation Re-Animator; Richard Stanley’s Dust Devil (which is also bundled with another Lovecraft adaptation, Color Out of Space); and a pair of Hammer horrors released by StudioCanal, The Horror of Frankenstein and Scars of Dracula; plus a non-horror title from Hammer themselves, crime drama Whispering Smith Hits London. Further on the non-horror front, Dust Devil was an import from Umbrella in Australia, which I accompanied with their releases of Mamoru Oshii’s Angel’s Egg and the second film from Cube director Vincenzo Natali, Cypher.

We finish the month with a third David Cronenberg: Criterion’s release of A History of Violence, which I don’t think I’ve watched since I saw it at the cinema back in 2005, despite owning it on DVD for most of that time. Well, a 4K release is the perfect excuse for a rewatch, isn’t it? Right after I get to the hundreds of other things I’ve said that about…

January’s Failures

Welcome to my monthly “Failures” column, where I look back at some of the films I could, would, maybe even should have watched last month… but failed to.

As usual, the new year in UK cinemas kicks off with a bunch of stuff the distributors held back from last year, for whatever reason (I don’t know how it will pan out in 2025, but in the past I’ve observed some awards-season not getting a UK release until as late as June or July). Highlights in that sphere included Robert Eggers’ remake of Nosferatu, awards season favourite The Brutalist, Robert Zemeckis graphic novel adaptation Here, nonlinear romcom We Live in Time, Jesse Eisenberg’s A Real Pain (*chuckle*), Dylan biopic A Complete Unknown, Callas biopic Maria, British-made Swiss-hero biopic William Tell, TV show, er, biopic Saturday Night, 18-rated sexy times for Nicole Kidman in Babygirl and Noémie Merlant in Emmanuelle, Mike Leigh’s BAFTA-but-not-Oscar-nominated Hard Truths, and Oscar Best Picture nominee Nickel Boys, which I confess I hadn’t even heard of before it’s nomination. Whew!

Despite all that, there were even some honest-to-God (if we ignore film festivals, which really we should) 2025 films released, including the latest Universal horror reimagining, Wolf Man; Steven Soderbergh’s latest attempt at making low-budget releases work, horror Presence; robot horror comedy Companion; and the horror of Mark Wahlberg’s hairline in Flight Risk. I guess horror really is the big screen’s perpetual friend.

Netflix attempted to cut through the noise by releasing Back in Action, an ironically-named (but probably deliberately so) spyfi comedy, because it featured Cameron Diaz’s return to the screen after a ten-year break. Yes, really. No, I don’t think anyone else had really noticed either. I’ve not heard anyone say a good thing about it. And I think that was it for streaming originals, sending us straight to streaming debuts of varying degrees of noteworthiness. I mean, for example, half of what Disney+ could muster was Nightbitch, which stars Amy Adams and I suspect was supposed to be some kind of big-ish deal, but has vanished without a trace. The other ‘half’, as it were, was Alien: Romulus. Plus TV series, which I think is where Disney+ focus their energy nowadays.

More promising titles were to be found elsewhere. NOW (and Sky Cinema) gave us Alice Lowe’s Timestalker, which I heard about when its theatrical release was up against something-or-other big and various outlets were pleading people to not ignore it. I imagine it stands a better chance on streaming; certainly, it’s high on my watchlist now. They also gave a belated UK bow to John Woo’s remake of his own Hong Kong action classic, The Killer, which I don’t think gained strong reviews but, hey, it’s John Woo, what do you expect? His Western work is regularly looked down upon, which I’ve always suspected shows the benefit of being subtitled when it comes to genre cinema… Which brings us to Twilight of the Warriors: Walled In — not a sequel, despite the coloned title making it sound like one but a well-received Hong Kong actioner; so well received, I only recently bought it on disc. Let’s hope it lives up to the hype whenever I watch it. Other things I’ve already bought but that also popped onto NOW this month included Bad Boys: Ride or Die and Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga (plus The Fall Guy — something I’ve actually watched! Wonders will never cease).

More foreign action was to be found on Amazon Prime in Kill, the Bollywood actioner that got a burst of publicity when the remake rights were bought by the makers of John Wick three days before its US theatrical release. Sounds worth a look, right? Prime also had much-discussed Nic Cage-starring horror-thriller Longlegs, and the belated UK premiere (skipping theatrical this side of the pond) of Dave Bautista action-comedy The Killer’s Game. Well, they can’t all be winners. Similar could be said of MUBI’s debuting titles, which are awards season runners but not likely winners: Denmark’s Best International Feature nominee The Girl with the Needle and Luca Guadagnino’s Queer, which has netted star Daniel Craig nominations at some ceremonies but, as it turned out, was shut out of the biggest ones (by which I mean BAFTA and Oscar).

On to back catalogue fare, and the one I’m going to flag as most unusual was the BBC airing all nine hours of Shoah and making it available on iPlayer afterwards. I’ve owned the Masters of Cinema DVD for yonks (and tried to make it part of Blindspot 2023, but failed to get round to it), and now here it is for free in HD. Will that mean I finally get round to it? I mean, it’s a nine-hour piece about the Holocaust — that’s the polar opposite of “easy viewing”. That’s not to say I don’t want to watch it, but it’s not something you just decide to bung on one day, y’know?

Aside from that, it was the usual reams of stuff across all the various streamers. I should probably focus on the ones I particularly want to see (and/or feel I should see) that I don’t have access to otherwise — like The Creator, Fruitvale Station, Gandhi, and Inside Llewyn Davis on Prime; The Conjuring and Pearl on Netflix; Cyrano, Defiance, and Roise & Frank on iPlayer; I’m Your Man, The Quiet Girl, Petite Maman, Pig, Sexy Beast on Channel 4 — but my attention can’t help but be drawn to all the ones I own on disc but haven’t watched yet — like the Wachowski’s Bound, Alex Garland’s Civil War, and Ridley Scott’s Legend on Prime; Elvis and Missing on Netflix; Enys Men, The Long Good Friday, The Northman, Old, Robin and Marian on Channel 4 — and that’s before I even start on the stuff I’ve bought on disc to rewatch and haven’t got to yet.

But (as I feel I use as a segue almost every month) that hasn’t stopped me buying even more stuff. The physically largest release of the month was Hammer’s lavish 4K Ultra HD set for Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter — noteworthy not just in itself, but also as an indication that Hammer are going to be handling at least some of their own Blu-ray releases going forward (rather than licensing them out), and at least some of those will get gorgeously lavish editions (only “some” because they’ve already promised not everything will come in such shelf-space-hogging sets). Other catalogue titles getting a fresh 4K lick of paint included Tarsem’s The Cell from Arrow, Kiyoshi Kurosawa’s Cure from Masters of Cinema, and a version of Se7en with controversial revisions by director David Fincher. It’s my favourite film of all time, so I’m both trepidatious and intrigued by the changes. Some seen borderline inconsequential; others look distractingly irritating (based on screencaps) — by which I mean: it’s not a recut or drastic reimagining, which could undermine the entire work; but things like replacing the sky during the finale have changed an entirely natural shot into something that looks like iffy green screen (again, based on screencaps. Maybe it looks okay in motion. If only there was a way I could find out…)

Other recent-ish releases that fall under this banner (but I had to import from the US, so they came out at the end of last year, but I’ve only ordered and received them now) included Oliver Stone’s Born on the Fourth of July, Brian De Palma’s Snake Eyes, and John Ford’s The Searchers, which is Warner Archive’s first foray into 4K, and received copious praise (indeed, I wasn’t going to bother with it, but the praise I’ve read was so superlative, I felt like I was missing out. Damn you, FOMO!)

My US order was bulked out by more UHD titles in the shape of the third Alfred Hitchcock Classics Collection. These aren’t individually named or numbered on the title, which has led to most people to just refer to them as volumes one, two, and three based on order of release; but each used a different colour for its title, and I’ve always thought it would be more fun if we referred to them by their colour — so this is the green one, containing Rope, The Man Who Knew Too Much, Torn Curtain, Topaz, and Frenzy. It came out back in 2023, and I always intended to pick it up when it dropped in price (as I did with the first two), but something weird went on with the UK release — I’m sure it came out, but it’s rarely listed by retailers (look on HMV and you can still get the red / volume one and blue / volume two releases, but no sign of this one), and even when it is, the pricing can be bizarre (Amazon UK most recently listed it for £499.99). So, I finally caved and imported the US release. The minor discrepancy in packaging from the first two bugs me slightly, but as I got it for over £450 less than the UK version (apparently), I can live with it.

Back to new releases, but in 1080p, and just popping in at the end of the month were a trio of Asian thrillers from some of the UK’s most consistent boutique labels. Undoubtedly the one with the greatest name recognition is the BFI’s release of Akira Kurosawa’s Stray Dog, while digging into more obscurities were Masters of Cinema for Johnnie To & Wai Ka-fai’s Running on Karma and Radiance with Seijun Suzuki’s Underworld Beauty. Those are all still older works, of course. Indeed, the only brand-new title this month was The Wild Robot. I wouldn’t typically buy a Dreamworks animation (not sight unseen, anyway — I do own a few), but this one has been so highly praised. Someday I’ll actually watch it and find out for myself…

December’s Failures

Welcome to my monthly “Failures” column, where I look back at some of the films I could, would, maybe even should have watched last month… but failed to.

On the big screen, Sony’s latest attempt at making a Spider-Man spin-off, Kraven the Hunter finally arrived almost two years after its first announced release date, and seemed to be received about as well as you’d expect for a Sony Spider-Man spin-off that had a two-year delay (i.e. poorly). In similar desperate franchise moves, animation The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim seemed to generate more column inches because they admitted it was rushed out to secure the ongoing Rings film rights, rather than anyone saying anything about the film itself. I feel like Disney’s Mufasa: The Lion King, a “live-action” prequel that no one asked for, must fall into a similar bracket.

Conversely, I’ve read Sonic the Hedgehog 3 is good; the crazy idea of making a Robbie Williams biopic starring a CG monkey seems to have actually paid off in Better Man; and I keep hearing how good Daniel Craig is in Queer. Various other films managed theatrical releases of various other sizes, of course, but the one that most intrigues me is Shakespeare / video game mashup documentary Grand Theft Hamlet, which I believe is coming to MUBI sometime early in 2025, so I’ll look out for it then.

Over on streaming, various attempts at creating a Christmas classic seem to have been overshadowed by Carry-On — not a modern revamp of the old British comedy series, but an airport-based thriller starring Taron Egerton. I’d probably have watched it if I had a Netflix subscription (there’s a few things on there I need to catch up on now, so maybe it’s time I signed up again). As for the aforementioned seasonal fare, Netflix had the Richard Curtis written and produced animation That Christmas, plus 15-rated “birth of Jesus” movie Mary starring Anthony Hopkins as Herod (that’s literally all I know about it. I’ve not seen anyone discuss or review it. Is it actually real?); Sky Cinema and their fateful Original brand tried public-domain-IP mashup The Night Before Christmas in Wonderland; and Amazon had the streaming debut of (briefly theatrically released) wannabe-blockbuster Red One — which apparently was a huge hit for them, even after it flopped on the big screen, thus proving once again that the best way to ensure a streaming success is to have a wide theatrical release first.

Meanwhile, Disney+ had… fuck all. You’d’ve expected them to trot out something seasonal, right? But I don’t think they even had a premiere that was, er, non-seasonal. Even Apple TV+ spat out Fly Me to the Moon, the Channing Tatum/Scarlett Johansson Nasa-during-the-space-race romcom with posters that made it look like a fake movie-in-a-movie. But Disney+ never have anything much new anymore in the way of original movies, it seems to me (just their high-profile theatrical releases making relatively-speedy debuts). Has the Mouse already got wise to the false promises of streaming originals? Let’s hope others follow suit.

In the second tier of films making their streaming debuts, basketball anime The First Slam Dunk came to Netflix. Sports movies aren’t normally my bag, but I’ve seen this on various “great films” lists (especially animated ones) for what feels like years, so here’s a chance to… be reminded to watch the other copy I, ahem, got hold of fairly recently. Indeed, Netflix seemed to specialise in things I already own but haven’t watched, which is always irritating. Other titles included Marcel the Shell with Shoes On, Puss in Boots: The Last Wish, Scream VI, and Knock at the Cabin, which has already been on NOW so I’m doubly miffed at myself. NOW themselves pulled the same trick with Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire, plus Abigail, Kung Fu Panda 4, and A Quiet Place: Day One. And at the more… esoteric end of the spectrum, MUBI had a new version of an old film in Caligula: The Ultimate Cut, and a film they self-described as Andrea Arnold’s “long-awaited return to fiction filmmaking”, Bird.

The ever-changing streaming back catalogue is a beast of greater size than even Santa’s bulging sack, but a selection of titles of particular interest included Killer Joe, Mississippi Grind, The Reader, Warm Bodies, and the return of streaming perennial The Notebook (all on Amazon); Bodies Bodies Bodies, I, Tonya, King Richard, and Stan & Ollie, and the original Point Break, which I’ve been meaning to rewatch (all on iPlayer); and Brian and Charles, I’m Your Man, Petite Maman, A Quiet Place Part II, Spencer, and The Worst Person in the World (all on Channel 4). There were also various other Christmas-related movies, like The Holiday (which has somehow transformed into a modern classic in recent years) and various versions of The Grinch, none of which I’m going to watch in January because it’s not Christmas anymore. Maybe next year.

The above paragraph doesn’t even touch on all the films that arrived on streamers this month but I already own on disc and haven’t watched, acting as a reminder of the slight ludicrousness of my physical media collection. A soupçon of particularly daft ones (read: I’ve owned them for so long, why haven’t I watched them?) includes on Howard’s The Missing, Guy Ritchie’s Revolver, and Alfonso Cuarón’s Y Tu Mamá También on Netflix (I own all of those on DVD. Why would I watch a DVD when they’re streaming in HD? Besides, for all I know they could have disc rot or something by now); Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby, Billy Wilder’s The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes, and Ben Affleck’s The Town on Prime; Terry Gilliam’s The Brothers Grimm, Sergio Leone’s A Fistful of Dynamite, and Alex Cox’s Repo Man on NOW; Nicolas Roeg’s Don’t Look Now, trilogy-completing How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World, and John Frankenheimer’s The Train on iPlayer; and Brian De Palma’s Carlito’s Way, Robert Eggers’s The Northman, and M Night Shyamalan’s Old on Channel 4. And that’s without even starting on stuff to rewatch.

In the face of such overwhelming evidence that I don’t watch enough of what I buy, I naturally went ahead and bought even more. Now, of course I’m going to buy something like Alien: Romulus, because I own all the others and I’m a completist. I’m not sure the same logic really applies to Joker: Folie à Deux (I stopped buying all the DC movies a while ago), but there we go, I bought it anyway. And I couldn’t resist a classic like Galaxy Quest making its 4K debut, especially when it comes with all the correct aspect ratios for the first time on home media. As for most of the rest of my purchases…

You know what, they’re not the sort of thing that usually turns up on streaming, so I feel a lot less bad about those. I’m talking the kind of stuff put out by Radiance: their Luis Buñuel box set, Nothing Is Sacred, containing Viridiana, The Exterminating Angels, and Simon of the Desert; Swedish crime thriller The Man from Majorca; and Japanese neo-noir Yokohama BJ Blues. I’m talking various labels’ commitment to getting loads of classic Hong Kong action on disc, which this month was represented by Eureka’s wittily-titled four-film set of historical epics directed by the prolific Chang Cheh, Horrible History, containing Marco Polo, The Pirate, Boxer Rebellion, and Four Riders. I’m talking stuff you can only get if you import it from Australia, like the third volume in Imprint’s After Dark: Neo-Noir Cinema Collection, containing Homicide, White Sands, The Crossing Guard, Heaven’s Prisoners, Under Suspicion, and Dirty Pretty Things; plus a pre-Bond Roger Moore in Swinging Sixties thriller Crossplot, and sci-fi noir The Man in Half Moon Street.

I’m also talking about stuff like Studiocanal’s epic Hitchcock: The Beginning box set. Streamers infamously have very few movies from The Past (often only a small handful from before 1980, if any), so who’s going to offer ten Hitchcocks from the 1920s and ’30s? Especially when almost half of them are silent. (Studiocanal do have their own channel on Amazon Prime, but that doesn’t really count.) The set includes both silent and talkie versions of Blackmail, newly restored in 4K, supplemented by the brand-new feature-length documentary Becoming Hitchcock: The Legacy of Blackmail. The set also contains UK HD debuts for The Ring, The Farmer’s Wife, Champagne, The Manxman, Juno and the Paycock (which was scarcely even available on DVD, if I remember correctly), Murder!, its German-language variant Mary, The Skin Game, Rich and Strange, and Number Seventeen; plus a wealth of special features — and you definitely don’t get those on streamers.

Okay, maybe the line gets a little blurrier elsewhere. Masters of Cinema recently released animation The Secret of NIMH, which is mainstream enough you might expect to find it streaming (though, currently, it’s not); but then they also released the Kinji Fukasaku-directed Japanese answer to Star Wars, Message from Space, and where else are you likely to find that but on disc? (Whether it’s worthy of being a Masters of Cinema release is another matter.) Of course, sometimes streamers will surprise you. Which one out of time-bending actioner Run Lola Run, East-meets-West Western Red Sun, and Ealing Comedy Kind Hearts and Coronets do you think is currently on a streamer? (It’s the Western.) You can rent the other two, but that’s not quite what I’m talking about. And I’ll add this: I got all of those on 4K UHD, and only one of them is streaming in that format. I may spend a disproportionate amount on physical media, but it’s still the best.

April’s Failures

I was going to go to the cinema this month, I really was, but then… I didn’t. Top contender was already mentioned in last month’s failures, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire. Seems like a real Big Screen experience. So when they drop it to smaller screens, but don’t even have the courtesy to drop the ticket price, it begins to seem less appealing. I’m sure my local’s smallest screen is still bigger than my TV (I use “sure” quite loosely there, in its lesser known sense of “not sure”. I mean, I’m sure it is literally bigger, but does it feel bigger when you’re sat however-far away from it?), but when a single cinema ticket is over half the cost of buying the film on 4K disc (which I know I’ll do), it lessens the appeal. Also nearly tempting me out of the house were Dev Patel’s Monkey Man (that just straight up disappeared entirely before I had the chance) and Alex Garland’s Civil War (but if I want to watch an Alex Garland film I’ve not seen, there’s Men on Channel 4 for free).

There were other theatrical releases in April, of course, which broadly break down into two groups: ones that will go straight on my watchlist when they hit streaming, and there’s a reasonable chance I’ll actually watch them, too; and ones that will go on my watchlist but probably just sit there, possibly forever. In the former, there’s Luca Guadagnino’s much-discussed tennis-themed love triangle / threesome (blurbs kinda imply the former; images suggest the latter; I’ve not read enough to know which it is; maybe both), Challengers; British period comedy Seize Them! (I don’t think these screened anywhere near me, but the trailer was funny enough); high-concept vampire thriller Abigail; and one-man-army actioner Boy Kills World (John Wick has given rise to many such movies, and, frankly, I’m not complaining). On the second pile, there’s Amy Winehouse biopic Back to Black; horror franchise prequel The First Omen (I’ve never seen any Omen films, so this was never going to top any lists for me); Ewan McGregor and his daughter on a road trip in Bleeding Love (not to be confused with Love Lies Bleeding (though search engines do), which is out tomorrow here); and Black comedies The Book of Clarence and The American Society of Magical Negroes (feels off to define a film by race like that, but they do seem to foreground it, so maybe it’s just fair).

In theory, Netflix rolled out some big guns to compete with all that. In reality, I’m not sure they represented much of a threat, or deterrent, or alternative, or whatever they’re meant to be in this half-arsed analogy I’m already wishing I hadn’t started. We’re talking primarily about the latest from totally non-controversial, never discourse-provoking, haver of a totally normal and sane fanbase, Mr Zack Snyder, and his Star Wars inspired / ripped off (depending how you want to think of it) Rebel Moon – Part Two: The Scargiver. I’ve not seen Part One. I’m still considering just waiting for his presumably-preferred Director’s Cut versions, which have been confirmed to be forthcoming since even before the first one came out, which feels like a bit of shoot-yourself-in-the-foot marketing from Netflix — I can’t be the only person who considered waiting, and then had whatever enthusiasm they had (mine: not high, but intending to watch with relative promptness) dampened by all the piss-poor reviews.

Also brand-new on Netflix: Prince Andrew interview drama Scoop (apparently decent but sort of pointless when the actual thing is out there); another Liam Neeson actioner to add to the pile, In the Land of Saints and Sinners (there are so many films from his action star era I’ve not seen that I’d probably choose over whatever the latest one is… if I ever chose any of them, which I don’t seem to any more); and live-action manga (re-)adaptation City Hunter, which I’ve heard is good and is definitely the most likely of these four to actually get watched.

Notable films on other streamers leant more towards previously-released titles making their subscription streaming debuts. Amazon Prime added The Zone of Interest, meaning all but one of this year’s Best Picture nominees is now on a subscription service; as well as horror… tenthquel(?) Saw X, and horror of a different sort (i.e. I’ve heard it’s terrible) in Expend4bles. Over on Disney+ there was an actual Disney film — their latest canon animation, Wish — while Apple TV+ added another reason for me to resubscribe in Matthew Vaughn’s latest, Argylle. I know the notices were terrible, but the trailer amused me and I’ve generally chimed with Vaughn’s work, so I remain cautiously optimistic. As for Sky Cinema / NOW, it was an unusually underwhelming month — adult-humoured talking-dogs comedy Strays seemed to be about the biggest get, although I’ve heard rumblings that BlackBerry is good. They’re also the UK home for the massively-belated sequel to Megamind — remember Megamind? It was the other superhero-themed animated kids’ movie the year Despicable Me came out, and for my money it was the better one. The idea of a sequel is, on paper, an immensely appealing one. Unfortunately, I’ve heard Megamind vs the Doom Syndicate is terrible in a “crime against cinema” kind of way. Even Sky — who are presumably trying to persuade you to watch the stuff they have to stream, especially when it’s a brand-new direct-to-them title — display it with a 0.5-out-of-5 star rating. Eesh.

Now, we’ve reached the part of the column where I say, “as always, there was loads of back catalogue stuff too”, because, yes, as always, there was loads of back catalogue stuff too. Ones that provoked a particularly “ooh, I have been meaning to watch that” reaction — before getting added to my watchlist and forgotten about again — included Assassination Nation on Netflix; The Prince of Egypt on Amazon Prime; Magic Mike and Mary Queen of Scots on iPlayer; and a whole host on Channel 4: Pig, Freaky, Riders of Justice, Monos, Eagle vs Shark, X, I’m Your Man, Hit the Road, Titane… It’s their ad breaks that put me off, really. Plus I never trust the TV-based streamers to show things in the highest quality. It’s all those years of both NOW and iPlayer maxing out at 720p, and ITV not seeming to move behind SD (have they now? I’m not sure).

Oh, and that’s all without mentioning the never-ending guilt trip of the streamers adding stuff I already own on disc and haven’t watched yet — Jurassic World: Dominion and Supernova on Netflix; Green Zone and Thelma & Louise on Amazon; Apocalypse Now: Final Cut and The Martian (I bought but never watched the extended cut) on iPlayer; and, again, a pile on Channel 4, including Venom: Let There Be Carnage, Censor, Desperado, Possessor, Weathering with You, The Long Good Friday, The Mist, Time Bandits… And MUBI were really rubbing it in by adding a movie I took a punt on preordering — two, technically, as Trenque Lauquen comes in two parts.

And that’s without even getting on to stuff I’d like to think about rewatching.

…instead of which, let’s jump on to purchases, because, good golly, there were plenty of them too. I can’t help myself! No, I really can’t, because this month I ended up placing two large-ish orders from the US; a mix of stuff my trigger-finger had been itching to get, and then somewhat-random other things (stuff I did want — I don’t literally buy anything, you know — but that I only bought now because if you get a Deep Discount order to a high enough value they stop charging VAT, somehow). I do sometimes get buyer’s remorse when I see the state of my bank balance, but actually receiving the parcels is like Christmas.

So, deep breath, those US parcels included a bunch of 4Ks: Criterion’s The Last Picture Show (imported to get sequel Texasville included, which has to be dropped from the UK release); both versions of The Manchurian Candidate; David Cronenberg’s Eastern Promises; Oliver Stone’s JFK and Natural Born Killers (both films I’ve been meaning to revisit since before this blog began, which is insane if you stop to think about it); then ’80s sci-fi comedy The Man Who Wasn’t There, which is in 3D and, yeah, that’s why I bought it; and on regular Blu-ray, silent epic Foolish Wives; intriguing Dracula adaptation The Last Voyage of the Demeter (which hasn’t had UK release of any kind yet); a new restoration of The Lion in Winter; and a handful of Fritz Lang’s Hollywood work: Beyond a Reasonable Doubt, While the City Sleeps, and You and Me. Heck, I even bought a DVD: Warner Archive’s Philo Vance Murder Case Collection of six ’30s and ’40s detective movies, starring the likes of Basil Rathbone and William Powell. The latter has no overlap with the Blu-ray set Kino are putting out later this month, which will surely make its way into a later order.

None of which means I dampened down my home territory purchasing. New 4Ks included a bunch of Indicator titles: their latest Jean Rollins, The Nude Vampire (subtle) and The Demoniacs, plus Ozploitation thriller Snapshot; plenty of martial arts action with Eureka’s release of China O’Brien 1&2 and a sale pickup of Enter the Dragon (to join the DVD and two Blu-ray copies I already have and won’t be getting rid of, either because of special features or because they’re part of a box set); and I finally caved on Arrow’s edition of Michael Mann’s Blackhat, although that’s more about the director’s cut exclusively included — but only in 1080p — on disc two. Talking of Michael Mann and caving, I also finally picked up 88 Films’ edition of Miami Vice — that would’ve been an instabuy last year if they’d managed to get it out in 4K, but, alas, no; so I tried to resist (it’s the first UK HD release of the director’s cut, but I imported the US edition donkey’s years ago), but new special features and including both cuts was always going sway me in the end. And that’s another film I’ve been meaning to revisit since before this blog even began. Jesus.

I’m still not done though, because Eureka also put out Blu-rays of Paul Leni’s The Cat and the Canary, which I’ve wanted to see for a while, and Jet Li superhero-ish actioner Black Mask; plus another poliziotteschi from Radiance-affiliated Raro Video, The Boss (part of a loose trilogy with Milano Calibro 9, which I have the 2015 Arrow release, and The Italian Connection, which someone now needs to release in the UK, please); and, for a bit of real culture, the new Ian McKellen Hamlet. It runs under two hours. For Hamlet! Remarkable. Maybe that will help persuade me to actually pop it in and watch it. I really should do that with discs more often…

February’s Failures

We begin this month with a vision of the future — the future being… erm, yesterday? Timelines get confusing when you’re writing about February in early March, but you’re also doing that writing before the post is posting… Anyway, what I’m getting at is, I went to see Dune: Part Two yesterday, which is a March release, but has a bearing on February’s failures insofar as it means this could be the last month of 2024 where I begin this column with a comprehensive(ish) overview of major UK cinema releases. (Do I really think I’ll make it to the cinema every month for the rest of the year? No. But do you have any idea how tough it is to find a broadly-interesting and/or fresh way into this column every month?)

So, what films did I miss in February? Well, there was Sony’s latest attempt at crashing the rep of the MCU by playing on the general public’s lack of awareness about the difference between a Marvel Studios movie and a movie based on a Marvel comic, Madame Web, which is reportedly at least as terrible as the trailers promised. Once upon a time this would be a definite “catch it later”, but I’ve still not seen Venom 2 or Morbius (fellow Sony Spider-Man-derived films), nor a whole bunch of actual MCU films, so… More likely to get a play as soon as it’s available at home (in this case, when it becomes part of an Apple TV+ subscription) is the latest from director Matthew Vaughn, Argylle. That also attracted much derision on social media, but, well, I actually liked the trailer, and I’ve enjoyed most of Vaughn’s films (even the maligned ones like Kingsman 2), so I’m still cautiously looking forward to it.

Elsewhere, there were alphabetically-opposed Oscar nominees American Fiction and The Zone of Interest; a belated UK release for The Iron Claw, and an even more belated theatrical bow for Pixar’s Turning Red; filthy-mouthed Britcom Wicked Little Letters (another I look forward to streaming eventually); and some other stuff that, frankly, I don’t even care to bother mentioning. There’s always a bunch of “other stuff” in cinemas, but if it’s not actually screening near me or I don’t have a strong compulsion to catch it eventually, is it really a “failure”?

So, on to the streamers. The only true new release there that I’ve noted this month is Orion and the Dark, a kids’ animation on Netflix from Charlie Kaufman. Wait, what? Am I sure it’s for kids? Well, it looked like it, but his last animated film certainly wasn’t, so maybe I’m mistaken. Not that I’m not interested, but you can tell my level of interest from the fact I’m not sure. Actually, of more interest to me on Netflix this month was 12th Fail, an Indian film that jumped high onto the IMDb Top 250 late last year, and thus is eligible — nay, should be a key objective for — this year’s WDYMYHS challenge. Just need Poor Things on subscription streaming and Godzilla Minus One to get some kind of home release, and I’ll have the full complement available to me again. Other notable Netflix newcomers included another 2024 Oscar nominee, Past Lives; Ken Loach’s latest, The Old Oak; Mark Rylance gangster thriller The Outfit; and tennis biopic King Richard.

Other recent films making their subscription streaming debuts included The Marvels on Disney+ (I’ll wait until I can pirate the Japanese 3D Blu-ray, thanks… then add it to my pile of MCU flicks I’ve not seen) and Wes Anderson’s Asteroid City on Sky Cinema / NOW, who also had a few other bits and bobs I won’t watch for years, if ever, so why list them? Not a streaming debut (it’s already been on MUBI), but new for a wide audience, Aftersun aired on the BBC this month, and so was on iPlayer afterwards. Does that change how likely I am to get round to watching it? Well, I had access to MUBI the whole time it was on there, so…

Talking of MUBI, their big add this month (at least in terms of actually seeing it promoted) was La Antena — the first movie they ever streamed, apparently, making its return after… however long. I saw it 15 years ago on TV and enjoyed it a lot. I’d like a decent and accessible disc release, but failing that, I ought to take the opportunity to catch it while it’s streaming. Other films of note on the arthouse streamer this month were François Truffaut’s Jules et Jim and Roberto Rossellini’s War Trilogy — Rome Open City, Paisan, and Germany Year Zero — all of which are acclaimed to one degree or another, so I ought to watch them all.

Amazon Prime are conspicuous by their absence so far, considering they often rival (or attempt to) Netflix for splashy premieres or big streaming debuts. Maybe they were focused on launching a series or something instead, I don’t know. Even their back catalogue additions that caught my eye this month were deep, old cuts, like Images, the 1972 British psychological horror film written and directed by Robert Altman; or It Happened Tomorrow, a sci-fi fantasy film from 1944; or The Long Night, a noir starring Henry Fonda and Vincent Price; or Lured, a British serial killer thriller starring Boris Karloff, George Sanders, and… Lucille Ball? And directed by Douglas Sirk? You what? I really should watch some of this stuff… Well, that’s the whole point of this entire column, isn’t it?

But what I really should watch more of are all those Blu-rays I keep buying. Yes, there was another plentiful pile this month. Let’s start at the top end, i.e. 4K Ultra HD, with prequel The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes — the only brand-new film I bought this month, actually, with everything else being catalogue titles. Sticking to 4K, those included Arrow’s box set of The Conan Chronicles (aka Conan the Barbarian, which I have seen before, and Conan the Destroyer, which I haven’t), StudioCanal’s remaster of Michael Powell’s Peeping Tom, and the Masters of Cinema edition of Stanley Kubrick’s Paths of Glory. Also from Eureka was a double-bill of Japanese gangster thrillers in Yakuza Wolf 1&2 (the film’s subtitles — I Perform Murder and Extend My Condolences — sound almost like Spaghetti Westerns or poliziotteschi, which feels promising). Talking of poliziotteschi, 88 Films returned to the genre with Street Law, while Radiance offered their typically eclectic stylistic spread with a bundle of releases that included historical drama Allonsanfàn, ’60s spy-fi adventure Black Tight Killers, and an “ambitious revision of the yakuza movie”, By a Man’s Face Shall You Know Him.

Aside from new releases, pickups of older titles (thanks to various multibuys and offers) included Warner Archive’s release of noir Angel Face, Criterion’s edition of Häxan, Flicker Alley’s collection of Georges Méliès Fairy Tales in Colo[u]r, and a couple of multi-film releases of independent utlra-low-budget genre exercises via 101 Films: Wakaliwood Supa Action Vol.1 (including cult favourite and former Letterboxd Top 250er Who Killed Captain Alex, which I’ve seen and will happily revisit, and the director’s later Bad Black), and Treasure of the Ninja, which also includes several other works by director and martial artist William Lee, chiefly Dragon vs. Ninja. Some people say physical media is dead, but you’re not likely to find wonders as diverse and obscure as this on any streamer.

September’s Failures

I was nearly tempted out to the actual cinema again in September. Ever since I first started seeing trailers for Gareth Edwards’s The Creator, I thought it looked promising — especially as I’ve enjoyed all of his previous films — and the recent word of mouth, since it started screening for critics, has suggested it would live up to those expectations. But it’s only just come out, and I was busy this weekend, so hopefully I can now make time for it in the next week or two.

Elsewhere, a lot of cinema bows this month were new entries in series, most of them ones I follow. A Haunting in Venice is the third of Kenneth Branagh’s Poirot adaptations. If its box office is anything to go by, it might be the last. I hope not, because I’ve been enjoying them. The Saw series returned from the dead — again — with Saw X. It’s a franchise of variable quality, but one I actually enjoy overall, though I never rush to catch a new instalment. I’ll be sure to catch it eventually, probably once it’s available on a service I already subscribe to. The same goes for the belated fourth entry in the Expendables series, which is apparently officially titled Expend4bles. It’s meant to be pretty awful, but then people have said that about every other film in the series so far, and I’ve mostly thought they were… alright. So, yeah, another one I’ll catch eventually. And the same can be said again of The Equalizer 3. Quite how that’s legged out to a trilogy, I don’t know — again, I’d describe each of the previous films as “alright”, but nothing about them screams “more is required”. But — as with all the others in this paragraph — I like them enough to watch it eventually.

An even more unlikely threequel is My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3. I remember the first one being a breakout hit back in 2002, and the first sequel — coming almost 15 years later — feeling like a desperate attempt to revive a once-popular-but-now-forgotten phenomenon. Quite how that non-event led to a third go-round, I don’t know. At almost the other end of the spectrum, Past Lives also hit UK screens last month. Well, I don’t know where it sits on that spectrum — I don’t really know what it’s about, other than people seem to like it because I’ve seen it ranked highly on Letterboxd. Very much the kind of film I’m not going to rush to the cinema to see, but if it’s that good, I’ll find out what it actually is — and watch it, no doubt — at some point in the future.

As for interesting premieres on streaming, there really only seemed to be two, both released right at the end of the month — and one of them isn’t even a film. That would be Wes Anderson’s collection of Roald Dahl-adapted shorts for Netflix, led by The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar and continuing with The Swan, The Rat Catcher, and Poison. I’ve seen some query why these weren’t bundled into a portmanteau feature, a la the Coen brothers’ Netflix film, The Ballad of Buster Scruggs; or at least lumped together as a ‘series’, rather than having their own separate listings. But I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that this is how Anderson wanted it; for them to be considered as four distinct shorts, not a de facto feature.

The other title of note was No One Will Save You on Disney+ (or Hulu if you’re in the States). I believe it’s some kind of sci-fi/horror movie that’s told without any dialogue, but I confess I don’t really know too much about it, because I hadn’t even heard of it before the day it came out, when I kept seeing critics pointing it out on Twitter, as if I would know what it was. Anyway, I’ve not read too much more for the sake of staying spoiler free, but it sounds intriguing. That said, there were a couple of other streaming debuts this month, but I find it hard to get excited for Robert Rodriguez rebooting Spy Kids again in Spy Kids: Armageddon, and Netflix don’t seem to have done much to push Reptile beyond “it stars Benicio del Toro” — if I couldn’t tell you much about No One Will Save You, I could tell you even less about that.

Of course, there were the usual array of theatrical releases making their streaming debuts. Disney continue to keep their theatrical releases as short as possible, with the live-action The Little Mermaid and Pixar’s Elemental already available to stream. Things take a little longer to reach Sky Cinema, where this month the most noteworthy additions were titles I own on disc but haven’t got round to: Knock at the Cabin, Marcel the Shell with Shoes On, and Scream VI; plus Tár, which I’ve now mentioned in this column three months on the trot. Really ought to get round to it…

In terms if back catalogue titles, MUBI proved the most interesting, with the likes of David Lynch’s obscure 1988 short The Cowboy and the Frenchman, Terence Davies’s Distant Voices, Still Lives, Apichatpong Weerasethakul’s Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives, and Nothing Sacred, a film I’d never heard of but which they bill as “an utterly charming, wisecrack-filled screwball comedy shot in the vibrantly weird palette of early Technicolor”. Sounds neat. Similarly niche is Róise & Frank, which I remember noting when it screened at FilmBath last year — because it’s about a widow who meets a dog she believes is her husband reincarnated, and regular readers will know how much I love a “cute dog” movie — and now it’s as accessible as can be on iPlayer.

Netflix’s offerings were, unsurprisingly, a bit more mainstream, including Wonder Woman 1984 (which I’ve had downloaded in 3D for yonks — I’m very behind on superhero movies), recent-ish reboots like Mortal Kombat and Tom & Jerry, Covid-era heist thriller Locked Down, plus both the 2013 Evil Dead remake/reboot/whatever and this year’s Evil Dead Rise. Now there’s a franchise I need to re-engage with the whole history of — I saw the original three when I was a bit too young to really ‘get it’, and have long meant to revisit them. Similar could be said of an otherwise very different film, The Usual Suspects, which popped up on Amazon — although I recently imported the US 4K release for that very reason. Still, it’s about the only noteworthy thing appearing on Prime this month.

Talking of stuff I’ve bought and not got round to… well, that’s the story of my Blu-ray collection, really. Now that I look at the list, a lot of it strikes me as horror or horror-adjacent, so perhaps it was best saved for October anywhere. I’m talking the likes of new 4K releases for Mario Bava’s Blood and Black Lace, David Cronenberg’s Crimes of the Future, It Follows, Tim Burton’s Sleepy Hollow, and British folk horror classic The Wicker Man; the BFI releasing Ken Russell’s Gothic; and a package of sale purchases from Severin including 4K releases of Lucio Fulci’s The Psychic and Alejandro Jodorowsky’s Santa Sangre, plus regular Blu-rays of bizarre-sounding sequel Nosferatu in Venice, giallo The Fourth Victim, and giallo miniseries Private Crimes.

It wasn’t all October-appropriate fare dropping through my letterbox last month, though. There were animated superheroes thanks to 4K releases of Batman: Mask of the Phantasm and Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (which I need to precede with a long-overdue play of my imported 3D copy of the first film); film noir, both widely acclaimed (Eureka’s 4K release of Orson Welles’s Touch of Evil) and deep cuts (Arrow’s third volume of Four Film Noir Classics, featuring Calcutta, Ride the Pink Horse, Outside the Law, and The Female Animal). There were sundry others, too: I finally picked up Ridley Scott’s Exodus: Gods and Kings in 3D (I quite liked it when I first watched it, and it was actually shot in 3D, so has long been on my “one day” list), and the BFI were finally able to release Peter Bogdanovich’s Targets (I seem to remember they had it on the schedule years ago and had to cancel it?) And as if that wasn’t enough, my replacement disc for Vinegar Syndrome’s Showgirls 4K finally arrived as well.

So, which of these delights will end up qualifying for my Challenge as September’s Failure? Your guess is as good as mine. But despite all the money sunk on discs, I wouldn’t be surprised if the streaming cute dog film won out…

August’s Failures

If you thought my three cinema trips in July meant a change in my habits, well, you were wrong — they were very much the exception rather than a new rule; three “special occasion”-type releases that just happened to come along on the back of each other. I mean, no one thinks the likes of shark sequel Meg 2: The Trench, racing video game adaptation Gran Turismo, Disney ride adaptation Haunted Mansion, or D-tier superhero Blue Beetle measure up to a new Indiana Jones, a new Mission: Impossible, or a new Christopher Nolan, do they? Not that I’m averse to watching any of those films, but I can wait for them on streaming.

There was actually quite the proliferation of theatrical releases this month, but the rest — The Blackening, The First Slam Dunk, Joy Ride, Strays, Theater Camp — fall broadly into the same camp (I haven’t been keeping up with reviews, so maybe some of them are terrible and I’ll never bother). One release we weren’t treated to here in the UK was new Dracula adaptation The Last Voyage of the Demeter, because apparently the local distributor went bust the other month. I believe it’s released by Universal Stateside, so why their UK operation didn’t pick it up, I don’t know (possibly some administration-related thing, I dunno). Not that I’d’ve gone to see that either, but it looks neat and I’ll watch it someday (of all the films listed in these first two paragraphs, it’s the one I feel I’m most likely to blind-buy on disc).

New offerings from the streamers weren’t up to much either (including the only one I did watch, Take That musical Greatest Day, which only missed out on being my least favourite at August’s Arbies due to something even worse). Indeed, I don’t think there was anything brand-new on either Amazon Prime or Disney+ (if there was, it didn’t even make my long list), while the best Netflix could muster was Gal Gadot action vehicle Heart of Stone (it’s on my watchlist, but so are a bunch of other high-profile Netflix actioners I haven’t got round to) and Chinese legend-inspired animation The Monkey King (I’m interested in the underlying story, but the trailer for this particular telling wasn’t appealing to me). Of more interest (though apparently it’s not a Netflix Original; though I don’t think it’s been released anywhere else) was T.I.M., about an AI robot. It seems to have low scores online, but it’s a timely-sounding British-made sci-fi, so that’s something.

The most noteworthy thing in the world of streaming this month, as far as I’m concerned, was that arthouse outfit MUBI have decided to drop one of their original USPs, that of adding a new curated film every day. They’d already moved away from that “ever-changing selection of 30 films” concept when they introduced their library a few years ago, but now they’ve abandoned it to be… just like every other streamer, only with artier titles. There are pros and cons, I guess; one of which is, I’m not sure how easy it will now be to keep track of new additions. From their final regular lineup, the standout to me was Medusa Deluxe, which they described as an “audacious and extravagant one-shot whodunnit”. Sounds up my street. Whether I’ll remember to get round to it is a whole other matter.

Even new-to-streaming and back catalogue picks were a bit slim this month. I jotted down a few things new to Amazon Prime, but ultimately don’t feel any are interesting enough to call out. The possible exception is Paul Thomas Anderson’s Licorice Pizza, but for the wrong reasons: it’s now left Prime (after a year of availability — time flies!) and, obviously, I didn’t get round to it. Dammit. The same thing happened with Ip Man 4 on Netflix, although in that case it had been on there for three years. Three years! That’s the problem with streamers: unless you watch something quickly, you tend to just forget it’s there, until it isn’t. At least The Power of the Dog only left Netflix because it was headed to the BBC; although, after having it available in 4K, I can’t imagine I’ll watch it in iPlayer’s impression of HD. And over on Channel 4, things are only around for a month at a time, so it’s more understandable that I didn’t get round to German “Dan Stevens as a robot” romcom I’m Your Man or Daniel Scheinert’s pre-Daniels effort The Death of Dick Long. That said, they’ve both been streamed by C4 before, so I’ve consistently failed them. Maybe next time…

Disney+ offered up Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3, but I’ll wait until it comes out on 3D Blu-ray in Japan and I can, uh, get hold of that version. Then I probably won’t watch it, because I’m way behind on Marvel, and feel like there’s a small pile of stuff (Thor 4, the Guardians Holiday Special, maybe other things) I need to watch first. (It really feels like they’re killing off casual audience interest in the MCU just as quickly as they can.) Meanwhile, Netflix’s catalogue additions were the kind of thing I pop on my watchlist and maybe get round to, maybe never do. I’m talking about the likes of Dear Evan Hansen (meant to be so bad that it piques my curiosity) and Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (a franchise reboot that went nowhere, so presumably is also poor).

Personally, the most major thing I took from the streamers this month was reminders of stuff I really ought to rewatch, and that I own on disc for that very purpose. Sky Cinema led the way with Goodfellas, which I feel is massively overdue a second look. That’s been delayed somewhat by my own humming and harring: I would’ve bought it on 4K, but I’d only recently got the remastered BD when that came out. As both were now years ago, I kinda regret it, but here we are. Is it worth spending more money, or just “live with” the BD? Either way, I should make a decision and bloody watch it. A title in a similar position — except I did upgrade to 4K in spite of only relatively recently buying (and not watching) the remastered BD — is Heat. Thanks to both MUBi and BBC iPlayer for that reminder. In fact, the Beeb really dominate the market in this category, also reminding me I’ve long been meaning to go back to Point Break, The Third Man, This is Spinal Tap, and yet another film I’ve gone through multiple formats without actually watching, Highlander.

Five paragraphs ago I implied the streamers didn’t have much to offer, yet here we are. And I haven’t even listed all the other additions that have bulked out my various watchlists, or reminded me I ought to get round to playing the copy I actually bought. But then, as I say most months, if I got into that we’d be here forever. One thing I should mention, though, is the three titles I rented from Amazon back in July — because I didn’t actually get round to any of them during the rental window. Oops. I did manage to watch 65 in the end, by… other means; but that leaves Tár and Cocaine Bear outstanding. Naturally, the aforementioned “means” have also been used to keep those available to me — which might just be the worst fate of all, because making something perpetually available is just about the worst may to make me get round to watching it. Ho hum.

Talking of perpetual availability, let’s dig into all the stuff I bought on disc this month. I’d say it was a bumper month, but every month is a bumper month round here. No wonder I never seem to have any money. We’ll kick off where we kinda left off last month, with Dungeons & Dragons: Honour Among Thieves — as you may remember, it came out here on July 31st, but my copy hadn’t arrived. It turned up soon after, of course, and I’ve spent the next four weeks not watching it, even though I really want to. It’s high on my list to make time for. My only other brand-new acquisition this month was even newer, because it was a direct-to-disc release: Babylon 5: The Road Home. I’ve never even seen all of the original Babylon 5 series and movies, but, y’know, one day. I also intended to watch this fairly quickly — maybe I still will (using my definition of “fairly quickly”, which roughly means “any time within the first year of release”), and maybe that’ll provoke me to get on with the series (perhaps when it too comes to Blu-ray later in the year, leaving my DVD box sets forever unplayed).

Of course, those weren’t the only new releases I bought this month — far from it — just that the others were new editions of catalogue titles (a distinction that perhaps doesn’t really matter nowadays, especially when the boutique labels are often releasing titles that have been otherwise unavailable for some time). My thorough-but-not-complete (I’m trying to show some restraint here!) collection of Radiance’s releases continued to expand with their three-film Commedia all’italiana box set, plus Hong Kong action-romance A Moment of Romance. Often there’s plenty of HK action to report here, with multiple labels releasing in that space nowadays, but the only other release this month was Eureka’s The Skyhawk. That arrived alongside their latest Buster Keaton Blu-ray, Three Ages; and they also released a three-film set of the work of Polish auteur Andrzej Żuławski under their Masters of Cinema label. Are Eureka one of the most diverse labels in the stuff they choose to put out? Probably. And yet nearly everything they do appeals to me, something I can’t completely say about any other label.

Perhaps the next closest in that regard are Indicator, who continue to release the erotic horrors of Jean Rollin in 4K with The Rape of the Vampire and The Night of the Hunted; plus, in a similar space, Italian horror Black Magic Rites; and, for something completely different, I also belatedly (it came out in July) grabbed their release of classic-Hollywood supernatural noir Night Has a Thousand Eyes. That’s still not everything they put out, but I’m trying to be a little more circumspect there (leaving some titles for potential sale purchases, or to tip just-short orders over the £50 free postage barrier; though I’ve missed a couple of their “bundle” offers in waiting for that, which is less than ideal when trying to save money).

Rounding out this month’s stack were a few titles on 4K that I’ve seen before and had been waiting to come down in price: Deep Impact, The Maltese Falcon, and Training Day. Also, I finally managed to import Criterion’s release of Thelma & Louise for a reasonable (enough) price. With the recent announcement that Criterion’s new UK distribution partner will be bringing some of their 4K titles to the UK, hopefully waiting for a US bargain will be a thing of the past… though their UK titles aren’t coming cheap, so the savings won’t be massive; not to mention the stuff they won’t have the UK rights for, of course. That said, as fêted as Criterion are by some, there are UK labels who do 4K better; so, as long as the rights are with someone, there’s a fair chance we’ll be well catered to.

Finally for this month, a large box from the sale Vinegar Syndrome held a while back, including 4Ks of the British answer to Godzilla, Gorgo (whoever thought we’d be seeing films like that in 4K? And before some titles from iconic, popular filmmakers like James Cameron and David Fincher have even had regular Blu-ray releases. The physical media market is crazy nowadays), German single location thriller Out of Order, indie sci-fi Prospect, and a cult flick I’d never heard of before but looks so fun I’m worried it won’t live up to the hype I’ve generated in myself for it, Six String Samurai. Filling out that box further were gialli Delirium (not the video nasty one) and Trauma (a minor work from arguably the subgenre’s most famous proponent, Dario Argento), plus Gothic stop-motion animation The Pied Piper.

All exciting stuff! Now I just need to actually watch some of it…

The Best of 2022

And so my review of the year reaches its end in the usual fashion: with the best films I watched for the first time in 2022, plus a few honourable mentions, and a list of notable new releases I missed.

Regular readers may have noticed there’s no “worst” list this year. As I wrote last year, the idea of singling out a list of bad movies has become highly unfashionable in recent years, especially when big-name publications do it. I don’t think such lists are wholly without worth (they acknowledge that, as a film viewer, it’s not all sunshine and roses), and there’s a big difference between a major publication slagging off some recent releases (which may affect those films’ continued financial success and their makers’ careers) and a one-man blog picking a couple of lesser films from what he happened to watch that year (which rarely includes recent releases, and wouldn’t have an impact on them even if it did). Nonetheless, in the spirit of celebrating what you love and staying quiet about the rest, I’ve decided to ditch my “worst” list. (If you want, there’s still the “Least Favourite” award in my monthly Arbies.)

With that said, it’s on with…



The Eleven Best Films I Watched for the First Time in 2022

Continuing with the methodology I’ve used since 2016, this list features the top 10% of my first-time watches from the year. In 2022, the total was 111, which means there are 11 films on this year’s “top 10”.

As ever, it’s not just 2022 releases that are eligible for my 2022 list. Consequently, in recent years I’ve included a ‘yearly rank’ for films that had their UK release during the previous 12 months. However, I watched so few of the year’s big hitters in 2022 that I felt to rank what I did see would be misleading. There are too many acclaimed films omitted only because I’m not able to consider them, not because I don’t think they’re worthy. Hopefully I’ll get back on top of seeing new releases, so a yearly ranking can return in the future.


Take a noir storyline then run it through gritty “kitchen sink” British sensibilities, and you get this: a film that works as both a neo-noir gangster thriller and a character study of a man revising his views of the world. [Full review.]

10

Prey


Studios keep trying to rehash their ’80s sci-fi/action IPs, and they keep producing mediocre results. Thankfully, someone has finally bucked the trend. Prey works in part because it abandons continuity and takes a back-to-basics approach to its alien menace. Setting it in a completely different time period adds more opportunities for fresh perspectives and developments. It’s such a seemingly simple idea that works so well, and one that’s eminently repeatable. Predators vs knights? Predators vs samurai? Predators vs cowboys? Yes, yes, and yes, please, and anything else you can think of. [Full review.]


Michael Bay has always been a divisive filmmaker. His brash, bombastic style isn’t for everyone. But I think there’s a method to his madness (even when it results in trash) and so, when he’s on form, he remains one of the most exciting action filmmakers. Ambulance shows he’s still got the goods. You could imagine the storyline — after a bank heist goes wrong, two crooks escape in an ambulance, along with the cop they shot and a paramedic trying to save him — being from a 1940s film noir; a grim character study of men under pressure. That side of it is still in there, just dressed up with all the wildness of only-semi-restrained Bayhem. [Full review.]


A thriller about… writing a book? Ah, but when the book in question is the autobiography of a disgraced, potentially criminal former Prime Minister, and the book’s new ghost writer has been brought in because his predecessor died under suspicious circumstances, well, you begin to see where there are questions to be answered. Pierce Brosnan is perfect for the role of a former politician who is 50% charming and 50% believable as a scheming villain, while Ewan McGregor leads us through the twisty plot as an everyman who needs the money but still has a conscience. Will the truth out? [Full review.]


Spielberg, man. If you’d told me a remake of West Side Story would end up in my top ten of the year, I’d have given you a funny look. I didn’t love the original film version, but I also didn’t think it could be bettered — it’s a classic for a reason. Surely any remake was doomed to be lesser? But ah, here comes Steven Spielberg, a director whose style clearly chimes with my taste (in fairness, his work helped define my taste, thanks to watching the likes of Indiana Jones, and Spielberg-produced/-emulating movies such as Back to the Future, at a formative age). His version screams Movie in a way so few films do nowadays, and the changes he and his team have made to the material elevate it even beyond the ’61 film, for my money. [Full review.]


Toshiro Mifune plays a man presented with a life-changing moral dilemma in this thriller from director Akira Kurosawa. It’s a film of two halves: the first, contained almost to one room in near-real-time, sees Mifune’s business executive grapple with a conundrum that could ruin his career; the second becomes intensely procedural as it follows the police investigation and fallout from Mifune’s actions. With its precision attention to detail and healthy dose of mundanity, Kurosawa conjures an intense realism — the film could almost be a documentary; only, a documentary could never be this finely controlled. [Full review.]


Disappointingly relegated to “Sky Original” status here in the UK (usually a dumping ground for low-quality genre movies), Mass is a film that deserves to be more widely seen (the story of too many films buried on random streaming services nowadays, I fear — how many people have actually seen Best Picture winner CODA when it’s locked away on Apple TV+?) The less you know going in the better to be hit with the film’s full emotional weight. And it is a heavy film, but only in a way the befits its subject matter. Made up almost entirely of four people sat round a table talking, it is nonetheless “a blisteringly emotional gut-punch … but, with that, it’s ultimately cathartic.” [Full review.]


I do enjoy a Disney animation, but one has never broken into my top ten before (Zootropolis was 15th in 2016 and Moana was 16th in 2017). That’s partly the luck of the draw (I watched over 50% more films in each of those years), but also something about how well Encanto works — which, frankly, I can’t quite put my finger on. I mean, all the obvious elements are there: catchy songs, likeable characters, impressively fluid animation, a strong message about what matters. But there’s something else, too; a sprinkling of magic that, for me at least, elevates the film to be something even more special. I say I like a Disney film, but I don’t revisit them too often. I’ve already watched Encanto twice. In one year? That’s not like me! So, hopefully you see my point. [Full review.]

3

Top Gun: Maverick


I feel the need — the need for actors doing their flying stunts for real! Striking usage of the IMAX aspect ratio! Memorable callbacks to the original movie! Cheesy music that fits the tone perfectly! Actual humour! Proper subplots! Top Gun: Maverick is old-fashioned blockbuster moviemaking done with modern sensibilities (can you imagine them actually putting actors in jets back in the ’80s? For one thing, where would they have put those great big film cameras?) Actor/producer Tom Cruise has spent decades now perfecting this brand of big-screen entertainment, and here he shows the next generation how it should be done — both in-film, as a pupil-turned-teacher trying to get a class of the best pilots to be even better, i.e. as good as he is; and in real life too, rocking up in an era when the box office is dominated by previz- and CGI-driven superhero theme-park-rides-as-cinema, and giving us a done-for-real spectacle that kicked all their asses at the box office. The movies, and movie stars, are only dead when Tom Cruise says they are.

2

Les Enfants du Paradis


According to IMDb, when Children of Paradise (to use its translated title) was initially distributed in the USA, it was promoted as “a sort of French-made Gone with the Wind”. It’s not a bad comparison. Not in a literal sense — this isn’t about a spoilt rich girl getting caught up in a civil war on the wrong side — but as an epic, years-spanning romantic melodrama? There are some similarities. It’s the story of a courtesan-turned-actress and the four men in her orbit — a mime artiste, an aspiring actor, a wannabe crook, and a moneyed gent — in and around the theatrical scene of 1830s Paris. It’s told with a style that feels adapted from a novel — it’s got that kind of scope, with its timespan and array of characters, and depth, which feel more like literature than something conceived directly for the screen. In fact, most of the characters are based on real people, which I suppose is neither here nor there, but does add another layer of interest. Whatever makes it work is enough to keep it thoroughly compelling even with a running time over three hours.

1

Manhunter


I first became aware of Manhunter many moons ago, as a piece of footnote trivia in the history of movies: “did you know there was a Hannibal Lector film before Silence of the Lambs?” What a crazy idea! How bad it must have been to be so thoroughly overshadowed by Anthony Hopkins’ Oscar-winning version. Well, the history of the movies is rarely so straightforward; and as the immediate acclaim for Lambs has died down, and its various sequels and prequels have petered away, Manhunter has been able to reemerge somewhat. And so it should, because this is a great movie. Maybe not a great Hannibal Lector movie (Brian Cox is very good in the role, with less of the ticks and tricks that made Hopkins so memorable, but he’s not the focus of the story), but a superb “hunt for a serial killer” thriller. It’s dripping with ’80s style thanks to a director who helped define what that even meant (via his involvement with Miami Vice), while the hero cop, played by William Petersen, feels ahead of his time, struggling with the mental toll of previous cases as he tries to do the right thing and stop another killer. Such a mix of style and substance makes for an all-round fulfilling film; one that I think deserves every bit to be celebrated alongside Jonathan Demme’s more widely-acknowledged movie.

To celebrate it topping my list, Manhunter is on BBC Two tonight at 11:05pm, and on iPlayer for 30 days afterwards.*

As usual, I’d like to highlight a few other films.

Firstly, I wrote this little paragraph not sure where to use it, but here seems a good place. That’s to say: I love a minor film noir. Just a solid, competently made, usually 60-to-80-minute programmer. The highly-regarded Classics are all well and good — I appreciate their quality; why they’re ‘better’ — but, in many respects, I get more actual enjoyment (certainly in a relaxed, easy-viewing sense) from a run-of-the-mill type film. Not bad ones, you understand, just average fare. And here seems a good place to say that because 2022’s Challenge compelled me to watch a few noirs of that ilk. All of them were on the long list for my top ten, but none quite made it. I’m talking about the likes of Christmas Holiday, He Walked by Night, Killer’s Kiss, My Name Is Julia Ross, and Repeat Performance. (I also liked The Killing, but that’s in no way a “minor” noir.) Mr. Soft Touch grew on me as it went on, too, but that’s probably one to only be watched in December.

Next, here’s a recap of the 12 films that won the Arbie for my Favourite Film of the Month. Some have already been mentioned in this post, but some haven’t… In chronological order (with links to the relevant awards), they were Mass, Ghostbusters: Afterlife, West Side Story, High and Low, Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, The Ghost Writer, Ambulance, Repeat Performance, Top Gun: Maverick, The Mission, Manhunter, and Les Enfants du Paradis.

Finally, something I’ve always done in this section is list every film that earned a 5-star rating during the year. In part that’s because there’s normally far too many to include in my list, even if it weren’t for the fact 4-star films usually sneak in too. But this year, there were only six films that received full marks, and all of them made the top 10%, too. Nonetheless, they were Les Enfants du Paradis, High and Low, Manhunter, Mass, Top Gun: Maverick, and West Side Story. Additionally, there were also full marks for my rewatch of the original Scream.

I’ve been creating these “50 Unseen” (as I call them for short) lists for 16 years now, and it doesn’t get any easier to choose what to include — or, rather, what to exclude.

It became a little easier in the past few years, because I was watching so many movies that the number of wide-release titles I’d missed fell, leaving room for more arthouse-y ‘hits’ — films the masses didn’t see but Film People were chatting about. But I watched very few new films this year — just 18 with a 2022 UK release date, down from 30+ in the last few years (with a high of nearly 60 in 2019). Those are small numbers compared to people who watch multiple brand-new films every week, but it had been enough to cover a significant percentage of ‘major’ releases. 18 is… well, not.

With an initial long-list of almost 150 films, I did consider increasing this list to 100 titles. It would be in keeping with the site’s theme, after all. But 100 is such a big number… I mean, history suggests I won’t manage to watch the 50 listed films within the next decade or two, so how long would 100 take? No, 50 simply feels about the ‘right size’ for a list of this type, whereas 100 feels excessive. Besides, something is always going to get left off, it’s just how far down the list that cutoff comes.

So, with the caveat that I’ve inevitably forgotten or misjudged something really noteworthy, here’s an alphabetical list of 50 films designated as being from 2022 that I haven’t yet seen. They were chosen for a variety of reasons, from box office success to critical acclaim via simple notoriety, and hopefully represent a spread of styles and genres, successes and failures.

Avatar: The Way of Water
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever
Everything Everywhere All at Once
Jurassic World Dominion
RRR
Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
The Batman
Decision to Leave
Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio
Nope
Turning Red
The Whale
Aftersun
All Quiet on the Western Front
Avatar: The Way of Water
Babylon
The Banshees of Inisherin
The Batman
Black Adam
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever
Blonde
Bullet Train
Crimes of the Future
Decision to Leave
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
Don’t Worry Darling
Downton Abbey: A New Era
Elvis
Empire of Light
Everything Everywhere All at Once
The Fabelmans
Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore
Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery
Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio
Halloween Ends
Jackass Forever
Jurassic World Dominion
Lightyear
Men
The Menu
Minions: The Rise of Gru
Moonfall
Morbius
Nope
The Northman
Pinocchio
Roald Dahl’s Matilda the Musical
RRR
She Said
Smile
Sonic the Hedgehog 2
Strange World
Thor: Love and Thunder
Three Thousand Years of Longing
Turning Red
Tár
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent
Uncharted
Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
Wendell & Wild
The Whale
X

And that’s another year over.

I gotta say, I’m quite pleased with how quickly I wrapped it all up — I haven’t got my “best” list out by January 6th since 2017. It shouldn’t feel like a rush to get this stuff online, but when many people are sharing their lists before the end of December (or even earlier, in the case of some publications), a week or more into January feels “late”.

Anyway, I’m going to leave a couple of days to let the end of 2022 finally sink in, and then I’ll start waffling on about my targets for 2023.


* Obviously it’s not actually because of my list, just a coincidence. ^

December’s Failures

13 years ago, I went to see Avatar on opening day, because it was the only chance I’d get over the Christmas period. This year, with long-delayed sequel Avatar: The Way of Water releasing at the same time, I… didn’t do the same thing. But it’s been a massive hit (even without my one ticket purchase? Shocking!), which means it’s still regularly playing, so I might catch it this week.

It’s fair to say there’s been nothing else quite so notable on the theatrical release slate, partly because everything cleared out of Avatar‘s way. The parting shot from the rest of cinema at the start of the month was Santa-based actioner Violent Night, which sounds fun in concept but I heard was disappointing in execution. I guess I’ll try to remember to catch it on streaming next December. Otherwise, it was mostly small independent-type titles or limited-release Netflix flicks. Either way, not much of that plays around me (as ever, by “around me” I mean “not at the cinema that’s a five-minutes drive away”. If I were prepared to travel 30–60 minutes (not that far, in the grand scheme of things), I could choose to see more of this stuff. But as getting off my arse to go to that five-minutes-away cinema is hard enough, I’m hardly likely to trek further afield.

Of course, nowadays there’s less need to, with stuff making it to streaming quicker than ever. Or even to TV, with latest Bond flick No Time to Die receiving its UK TV premiere yesterday, just 15 months after its theatrical release. Remember when we had to wait three to five years for that kind of thing? And it’s not just shorter windows, what with streamers producing their own high-profile content. There were more big titles premiering on Netflix this month than at cinemas. Chief among them, Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery (to give it its full, unwieldy, unnecessary title). I’m very much looking forward to it — so much so that I didn’t watch it, because I had a rotten cold over Christmas and knew I wouldn’t be able to enjoy it properly. Another one to slot in this week, then.

While that ended up dominating the conversation (and Netflix’s viewing chart), in December they also brought us Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio, Alejandro G. Iñárritu’s Bardo, False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths, Noah Baumbach’s White Noise, a racy (read: sex-filled) new adaptation of Lady Chatterley’s Lover, Scandi monster movie Troll, computer-animated festive musical Scrooge: A Christmas Carol with a starry British voice cast (Luke Evans, Olivia Colman, Jessie Buckley, Jonathan Pryce), and The Big 4, a new one from the director of Headshot and The Night Comes for Us, Timo Tjahjanto, which I hear has suitably extravagant action scenes. As if that wasn’t enough, I also spotted 7 Women and a Murder, an Italian comedy mystery about seven women trapped in a mansion solving a murder, making its international debut as a “Netflix Original” a year after being released in its native Italy. I guess they bought it in as something to offer people who’d just watched Glass Onion. Also of note, apparently, was Medieval — I’ve not heard anyone mention it, so I’ve no idea quite how this happened, but it was Netflix’s 3rd most-watched movie at one point over Christmas. Apparently it’s the story of a Czech commander who never lost a battle, and it stars Ben Foster, Michael Caine, Til Schweiger, and Matthew Goode. I guess “historical war movie with a few recognisable faces” appealed to people browsing Netflix for something new to bung on.

Other streamers focused on the Christmas period for their original titles, ticking the usual rom-com boxes, with the likes of Your Christmas or Mine? on Amazon Prime and Sky Cinema offering perhaps the most generically-titled movie ever, This is Christmas. Apparently it’s actually rather good (according to the one review I happened to read). Sky also premiered animated Terry Pratchett adaptation The Amazing Maurice, along with streaming debuts for the likes of Dreamworks animation The Bad Guys, “grey pound” target The Duke, Stephen King remake Firestarter, plus blockbusters (that I own on disc and really should’ve watched by now) The Batman and Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore. Also The Nan Movie, but the less said about that the better. Amazon, meanwhile, had the streaming debut of Alex Garland’s Men, and gave a big push to Wonder Woman 1984 — bit odd, considering how long it’s been around. That said, I’ve still not seen it, so…

Over on Disney+, it was the usual deal of stuff rushed fresh from cinemas: their latest canon animation, Strange World, a riff on pulp sci-fi-/fantasy adventure flicks that I guess should be up my street, but doesn’t scream “Disney”; plus adult-focused fare, both acclaimed (Martin McDonagh’s The Banshees of Inisherin) and, um, less so (David O. Russell’s Amsterdam). Debuts elsewhere included Park Chan-wook’s latest, Decision to Leave, on MUBI, and Will Smith slavery action flick / wannabe-awards-contender Emancipation on Apple TV+.

As for the free TV-tied streamers, I’m sure they offered replays of their Christmas-schedule premieres, but I’d seen most of those already (except for Pokémon: Detective Pikachu, which I actually own on 3D Blu-ray. I presume I heard the 3D was good or something, because the fact I still haven’t watched it indicates my broad level of interest). Anyway, catching my attention on iPlayer were the likes of A Bunch of Amateurs (about the amateur filmmakers of the long-running Bradford Film Club) and older flicks I really should’ve seen by now, like The Others and Out of Sight; plus obscure spy thriller When Eight Bells Toll, which I missed earlier in the year so appreciate getting another go at. As for All 4, they cycled in a bunch of stuff they’ve shown before and I’ve not got round to but, hey, you never know, maybe this time. We’re talking Black Rain, Monos, Wild Rose, Saint Maud, Rosemary’s Baby, The Red Turtle, several others… Someday.

Finally, as always, stuff I forked out for (or, as it’s Christmas, was given) on good ol’ shiny disc. This was set to be a pretty huge list (when isn’t it?), but the UK’s postal issues have delayed a couple of large overseas packages. I just hope they’re not lost… Anyway, there were plentiful additions to my 4K Ultra HD collection last month. Films I’d never seen included Baz Luhrmann’s Elvis and David Lynch’s Lost Highway (I imported Criterion’s release from the US via Amazon, and it took three goes to actually deliver me a copy that wasn’t damaged). On the rewatch pile, there were lavish editions of The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (the PQ doesn’t seem that much better than the old Blu-ray, to be frank, but there was more in the box, and I wanted to support Masters of Cinema going 4K) and Casablanca (although I also decided to keep my equally-lavish old Blu-ray edition, so I probably should’ve just bought the cheaper regular 4K release. Oh well). In more standard packaging, but welcome nonetheless, were Mike Hodges’ Croupier, Walter Hill’s The Driver, and Quentin Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction. I’ve owned the latter so many times, I was loathe to buy it again; but then I saw the picture comparisons

On regular ol’ Blu-ray, Sight & Sound’s new list inspired some prep for next year’s Blindspot (ooh, preview!) by picking up Criterion’s editions of Beau Travail and Close-Up (another import that Evri tried to destroy: a neighbour found my parcel halfway down the road in a hedge, soaked through from the stormy weather. I shit you not. Luckily, although the package was a mess, the contents were fine). Brand-new releases were limited to Phil Tippett’s stop-motion nightmare Mad God, but catalogue titles making their UK disc debut included a couple from Eureka — “girls with guns” classic Yes, Madam! and Bob Hope-starring comedy/horror double-bill The Cat and the Canary and The Ghost Breakers — plus a Kickstarter edition of 1926 horror The Magician.

Finally-finally, I actually bought a DVD — wonders will never cease (although it’s one of a couple I’ve picked up this year, so maybe not that exceptional). Spied in Network’s pre-Christmas sale, it’s The Edgar Wallace Anthology, a collection of noir-esque British B-movies from the 1960s. The set contains just a couple of films to get through — 54, to be exact. That should keep me busy for a while…

September’s Failures

Arguably my true failings his month were not watching any Blindspot or “What Do You Mean You Haven’t Seen” films, plus all the other 100 Films Challenge categories I’m behind on. But, as usual, this column will focus on all the new releases and purchases of interest that I didn’t see either.

The season for big-name blockbusters may have ended at cinemas, but that doesn’t mean there weren’t films worth mentioning — like George “Mad Max” Miller’s latest, Three Thousand Years of Longing; or a limited UK release for David Cronenberg’s Crimes of the Future; or Kevin Smith’s return to the milieu that made his name in Clerks III — and there were certainly films that generated blockbuster-sized numbers of column inches, like Don’t Worry Darling and its endless behind-the-scenes controversies. In and around those were the likes of starry whodunnit comedy See How They Run; George Clooney / Julia Roberts romcom Ticket to Paradise. Also, a bunch of horror and/or horror-adjacent movies that seem to have accidentally released a month early: Fall; Bodies Bodies Bodies; Smile… Plus, horrific in a different way, the belated debut of Michael Flatley’s Blackbird.

And yet, for all that, the biggest of them all was arguably a re-release: James Cameron’s Avatar returned to the big screen for its… fourth? fifth? (I forget, but it’s had a fair few re-releases at this point) go-round at box office glory. I don’t think it topped the chart, but it certainly kickstarted conversation about the film’s merits (or lack thereof) and enduring influence (or lack thereof). I haven’t seen it since it was first in cinemas almost 13 years ago, so I probably ought to revisit it before the sequel arrives in a couple of months. The only question is, which version? Even without finding a cinema showing, I can choose from the theatrical cut in 3D, or two different extended cuts…

And talking of social media chatter, the only thing with even more than Avatar was Netflix’s Marilyn Monroe kinda-biopic Blonde, which some people would have you believe you’re an evil degenerate for even considering watching it. I’m 50/50 on its director, Andrew Dominik (I adored The Assassination of Jesse James; Killing Them Softly bored me), and, to be honest, he’s given some spectacularly tin-eared interviews in promotion of his new work. I don’t morally object to it, I’m jus not sure I care enough to give it nearly three hours of my time. We’ll see.

Other Netflix premieres included Lou, which I only heard about due to the Netflix Twitter account sharing some behind-the-scenes footage of Allison Janney’s fight training. But that day it was #1 in their films category, so maybe I missed some other promo. I also didn’t see any official promo for Athena, but I did see a couple of critics saying it was very good (while expressing their disappointment about it going direct to streaming — it was worth seeing on the big screen, apparently. Oh well, we’ll never know). Meanwhile, seemingly the best Amazon could offer was another mistimed horror remake, Goodnight Mommy with Naomi Watts, and horror-comedy My Best Friend’s Exorcism, which I just happened to see advertised on their app last night, hardly a ringing endorsement. (I call all of these horror movies “mistimed”, but there are people who spend the entirety of October just watching horror movies, so it’s a boon for them.)

Disney+ were getting in on the act too, with the debut of Hocus Pocus 2. I’ve never had any interest in the original, so I doubt I’ll be watching this either. Earlier in the month, discussion focused around the Robert Zemeckis-helmed live-action remake of Pinocchio. Even the best reviews couldn’t drum up much enthusiasm for it, but it goes on my watchlist — alongside the various other Disney live-action remakes I still haven’t got round to (Lady and the Tramp, Beauty and the Beast, etc), so who knows when, if ever, I’ll actually watch it… As for new-to-streaming titles, I think Disney+ also had the most noteworthy of the month with the latest divisive MCU instalment, Thor: Love and Thunder. Also catching my eye were a variety of short films — something streamers could do a lot more with in general, I feel — including Hard Way: The Action Musical (sounds… interesting) and The Devil’s Harmony, which I actually watched back in 2020 when it was Short of the Week someplace online, but I never got round to reviewing it. It was quite good.

Actually, maybe beating that Thor flick was Amazon bringing Everything Everywhere All at Once to the UK (it did have something of a theatrical release here, but Amazon are pushing it as an “Exclusive” as if it didn’t), which I only didn’t note more prominently because I’d already imported the 4K disc (see July’s failures). Other streaming debuts or re-appearances filling out my various watchlists included, on Amazon, Cyrano (the new one with Peter Dinklage, directed by Joe Wright), Chopping Mall, and Selma; on Netflix, Kajillionaire and Alejandro Jodorowsky’s Santa Sangre (which has already been removed again); on MUBI, Olivier Assayas’s Demonlover and Pedro Almodóvar’s Parallel Mothers (do you know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen an Almodóvar film? Ought to correct that); on BBC iPlayer, Journey’s End, The Sisters Brothers, Stan & Ollie, and Blazing Saddles (which I’ve seen but owe a reconsideration); and on All 4, Bacurau, Terrence Malick’s A Hidden Life, Monos, and True History of the Kelly Gang. I think some of these are available on other streamers already (especially when it comes to stuff on the TV-tied ones like iPlayer and All 4), but them getting added (or removed) does help remind me of their existence.

As ever, that’s just a few selected highlights — stuff comes and goes from these guys all the time, and I follow it all because I like to have an awareness of what’s available to me, but if I listed it all we’d be here forever (and these columns are long enough as it is). One streamer I haven’t mentioned is NOW, aka Sky Cinema, which I’ve just resubscribed to. I was supposed to be cutting down on streamers but I’ve ended up back on MUBI, Apple TV+, and now NOW! But they offered me two months (with their Boost add-on, which is essential because it’s how you get HD) for a total of £7 (vs £30 at regular rates), so I took it. I’m sure there’s a whole load of stuff on there I need to catch up on (I noticed they added Belfast at the beginning of the month), but I’ll look into that for next month.

Finally, as always, new additions to my disc collection. Almost all were brand-new releases this month, because the boutique labels just keep putting out interesting stuff, and there are more of those guys than ever — I remember when we basically just had Eureka/Masters of Cinema in the UK, and then Arrow came along, and now we’ve also got Criterion over here, and Indicator, and 88 Films and Second Sight have stepped up their games, and Radiance is on the way… Whew!

Anyhow, let’s begin with 4K. The highlight of the month there is surely Eureka’s first foray into the format, a box set of Jackie Chan’s Police Story Trilogy. I got my copy early, even, but unfortunately haven’t had a chance to watch any of it yet. 88 Films also made their 4K debut with Drive — not the Nicolas Winding Refn / Ryan Gosling cult fave (that came from Second Sight earlier in the year, you’ll remember), but the 1997 actioner. I remember the DVD cover; it was the kind of cheap-looking title I used to avoid that nowadays I kinda revel in. As for major label 4K titles, there was a nice box set for The Lost Boys (a film I’ve been meaning to revisit for years, and what better time?) and the regular release of Jurassic World Dominion (which I’ve not heard anything good about from anyone, but, hey, gotta complete the set).

No other brand-new films made their way into my collection this month, but plenty of other new releases from the boutiques did. To go label by label, from Arrow there was a pair of films with superb titles: Japanese epic crime drama A Fugitive from the Past and Indonesian action throwback Vengeance is Mine, All Others Pay Cash. Another title I love is All Deceased… Except the Dead (what does it even mean?), billed as a “mid ’70s Italian horror combining the aesthetics of Giallo with an Agatha Christie-style murder mystery” (sounds like my idea of a good time), which came from 88 Films, along with Yeun Biao thriller On the Run and Sherlock Holmes drama The Seven-Per-Cent Solution (which, I’m ashamed to say, I’ve never seen but am now buying for the third time. Anyone want the US Blu-ray? I think it might even still be sealed…) Indicator finally brought The Swimmer to the UK (if you don’t know, their releases are numbered, Criterion-style, and while some of their new titles are into the 300s now, this is #46, suggesting they’ve been working on it for a looong time). It’s missing the feature-length documentary from the US release, but I managed to, er, find a copy of that elsewhere. They also put out a two-film Robin Hood at Hammer set, which seemed worth a punt (I enjoy Hammer films; I enjoy Robin Hood films), and Madigan, which I confess I only bought to get the bundle discount (and because it sounded potentially up my street — believe it or not, I don’t buy just anything).

As for labels who only put out one title of interest this month (or where I mentioned the other title(s) already)… more martial arts action from Eureka in an Angela Mao double-bill of Hapkido (aka Lady Kung Fu) and Lady Whirlwind (aka Deep Thrust); Tom Hanks-starring ‘satanic panic’ Dungeons & Dragons-aping TV movie Mazes & Monsters, a worldwide HD premiere from Plumeria Pictures; Katsuhiro “Akira” Otomo-led anime anthology Memories from All the Anime; and 101 Film’s clone of Severin’s AGFA release Smut Without Smut, Volume 1, featuring two X-rated genre movies with the good naughty bits removed, to better allow you to focus on the genre stuff. They also include the uncut versions, fortunately.

And that’s it for another month! I say “that’s it” as if I haven’t just listed about as many movies for one month as I’ve watched in the entire year to date…